1. False. Sorry, Our Lady of Perpetual Profanity swears she has never put a day to bed without the dropping of an “F-bomb.” Dirty Mouth.

2. True. But I’m sure that (s)he TOTALLY had it coming.

3. True. In fact, when she first moved to Portland her plan was to drop music and go to culinary school at the Western Culinary Institute.

4. False. I’m ashamed of you. What kind of girl do you think she is?

5. False. Okay, that one was a gimme.

6. True. Boy, she’s got quite the rap sheet. Think she has any prison tats?

7. False. Tats she has, but not on her feet (OW). Some on her back, some on her front, some in places only Davey Nipples gets to enjoy.

8. True. Maybe if her mouth wasn’t so dirty ….?

9. True. So she would understand Bart Simpson, when he said on Mexican television, “Y los monos puedan volar de su trasero.”

10. True. She has size 12 whoppers. Allowing her to loan stilettos out to James for this picture:

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